I wouldn’t readily describe myself as a romantic.
I’m a Leo. I crave dramatics. It’s difficult for me to look on the bright side of things. I enjoy details and minute discoveries, not necessarily life-shattering events. I talk more than I listen and frankly don’t have much to say often, which leads to perpetual boredom in my own mind.
In short, while I’ve been in a committed relationship for three years, I wouldn’t describe myself as overtly romantic even though I’ve built my own world out of my relationship and we’ve worked very hard to keep it private and protected.
However, I’m overwhelmed with romantic notions after seeing Before Sunrise.
Synopsis: on a train to Vienna and Paris, respectively, American Jessie and French girl Celine strike up a conversation that proves to be fascinating. When the train stops in Vienna, Jessie asks if Celine will hop off the train and explore the city with him since he has no money for a hotel and plans to just walk around all night until his flight the following morning. He explains that he knows he will regret it for the rest of his life if he didn’t ask, and she obliges.
They walk, they talk, they meet people, they explore Vienna. They fall in love. The following morning when it is time to leave, they make a pact on the train platform to meet at that exact place six months from the time they stepped off the train together the evening before.
Do they meet again? Do they not meet again? What happens if they see each other again?
That is what Before Sunset is for.
I can’t stop listening to the songs from the movie and thinking about it because during the entire film, which is essentially very simplistic–its just a walk around the city in the span of 12 hours–I’ve never seen a film where people speak so honestly to one another about their lives, their dreams, their expectations from life. So often I feel like the only things I talk about are mundanities of everyday life–what I did at work, what I ate for lunch, maybe what I’m reading… That’s about it. And admittedly, I’ve been with my boyfriend for three years and we live together, so when someone knows everything you don’t tend to tell them all of this random incoherent thoughts about existence.
It was just so refreshing to watch because it reminded me that there is a whole reservoir of untapped questions and emotions and things to understand about myself that I don’t readily explore often because I put too much weight into the everyday actions of life.
And, quite frankly, it reminded me so much of myself and my partner in funny ways. It reminded me of when we first met one another and a whole world of possibility and joy was cracked open. We also met in a very odd way not too far off from this train scenario. I suppose it just filled me with this shiny, bubbly pool of feelings thinking that no matter what happens to me that version of myself is always intact in some way.
Maybe in a few days I’ll do an update to see if Before Sunset is still wrecking me. In the meantime, photographs.
A grave in Lafayette Cemetary in New Orleans where the exterior plaster has broken and the raw brick has been exposed. I wandered around this graveyard with family recently. It has tons of family plots dating back to the early 1800s… It was fascinating.
Vintage lamps that I couldn’t help but stare at for longer than necessary at a Magazine Street Antique shop